Oli, here's an easy recipe for cucumber "kimchi"...kind of like how mom makes. Yes, even you can make kimchi!
1. Here's your ingredients: cucumber (I used an English cucumber - it's seedless and the skin is a lot thinner than regular cucumbers), green onions, kochukaru (korean chili flakes), fish sauce, rice vinegar, salt.
2. Slice the cucumber thinly and chop the green onion - chop as much or as little as you want.
3. Put the cucumber in a bowl and toss with a pinch of salt. Let this sit for a few minutes and it'll help the cucumbers release some of their liquid. After that, toss all the other ingredients in the bowl. Use your judgement with the chili flakes since you don't like the spiciness - maybe just a tiny pinch will suffice for a little color. Add a small splash of fish sauce and a generous splash rice vinegar. Taste it and see if you want to add more vinegar or salt. It's up to you, but it should be kind of tart and sweet and salty. Enjoy!